Which school are you from?

One of the very entertaining and almost guaranteed peculiarities of being an Army brat is the non-permanence of the answer to that question. With the fathers being regularly transferred from one end of the country to the other, you would be hard pressed to find an Army kid who hasn't changed at least a few schools before they hit 12th grade. Amongst the brats, it sometimes turns into a contest of sorts - I'm in the 8th grade and I've been to 10 different schools. (No exaggeration - this actually happens!)

The very normalcy of this transience in an Army brat's life keeps coming back to me while I traverse adulthood as a civilian. 

When you have your own kids, people around you are panicking about which school to enrol their newborn offspring in. Even the pre-play-school (or whichever new group they invent next) is considered to be a life-changing decision. Which playgroup has inroads into which playschool has inroads into which nursery has inroads into which school has inroads into which college, and so on. People come up to you and advise you to enrol your 6 month old infant in the "right" school which he's supposed to start at age 4! And while I am using all my efforts to not laugh out loud, I see that they're dead serious. (I can only imagine what they must be making of my contorted expressions changing from ha-ha-that's-a-good-one to oh-my-you're-serious and finally settling on ok-let-me-pretend-to-be-concerned). I mean sure, it is possible and very likely that my kid will graduate from the same school I start him in. It's even likely that the quality of education, or the brand name of the school, or whatever else will have an impact on his entire life. But aren't people being over paranoid here? I mean kids can change schools you know. It's not unheard of, even amongst civilians. And this whole concern about how-will-he-adjust-and-make-new-friends is pure hog-wash. Adapting to change is probably one of the most important life skills one can possess. And you want your child - in the most formative years of his/her life - to be subjected to the least change possible? How are you preparing them for the real world then?!

Not trying to be callous here and ignore the importance of choosing the right education for your kid. All I'm saying is that it need not necessarily be a one-time choice that is the be-all and end-all of his/her existence! Pick a school that works best at that time, and if the need arises, change it later. What's the big deal? Why should I spend sleepless nights (well, more nights than a 6 month infant demands from you any way) fretting about which school, which board, which area, who do I know that can get me in, blah blah blah? I can not and do not want to chart out his class 10th board exam study timetable even before he's said his first words.

For now, I'm just happy cheering him in efforts to sit up on his own, and crawl all over my face, and cackle like a little monkey. School can wait. Who knows what all can (and will) change in the next three and a half years. I know I once went through four schools in that much time...

Different strokes for different folks

I've recently increased my frequency of travelling by cabs - thanks to the daily picking up and/or dropping of Baby at day care. And was very amused to come across two Uber drivers with such diametrically opposite views on the company.

The first driver was a typical quiet fellow, my only small peeve with him was that he refused to wait for 5 minutes as I picked up Baby. He said they weren't technically allowed to wait, and I should just rebook another Uber once I'm ready to go. Alright. If you're going to be so "by-the-book" I won't hold it against you. (Ok, not too much. But I'll still be a little resentful.) As luck would have it, when I rebooked an Uber after all or 4 minutes, big surprise - the same cabbie got assigned to me! Ha! A sheepish smile, and then the rant begins. He went on for the rest of the journey about how Uber is being unfair to drivers. They keep 20% of the fare, "aur unka kya kharcha hai?! Office mein teen log bithaye hain aur system chalu kar diya. Kharcha aur mehnat toh humari lagti hai" (What expense do they have? Just three employees and a software. We are the ones who have capital expenses, and it's our effort after all.) He accepted that Uber initially was very good to drivers, but according to him, they are now being greedy. Even gave me some back-of-the-envelope calculation for how an entire day's very hard work only yields him around Rs 1000 per day. Just went on and on about how all Uber drivers were unhappy and are pretty much on the verge of staging an agitation, apparently. 

But basically, he had no excuse for why it was so hard for him to wait for 5 minutes, and instead decided to bombard me with his life's "dukhad katha". 

Cut to the next day. For the same trip, I get a happy-go-cheerful fellow. He's wonderfully chatty about everything including how he's just had a leisurely lunch and afternoon siesta at home. And in complete contrast to the previous day, this fellow just couldn't stop talking about how brilliant Uber is. "They give money in the bank, on a regular basis. They aren't putting a gun to my head and forcing me to work. I even went to my native village for a month, no one asked me any questions. So much freedom." According to him, Ola had too much of an "ego problem" (his words), and had started running helter skelter as soon as Uber came on the scene. That day was one on which some autos and cabs were on strike in Mumbai, and Uber was incentivising drivers with an extra Rs 100 per pick-up. Despite that, he happily offered to wait as I went in to the day care (ha!). 

Alright I'll admit he was probably one of those souls who sees the silver lining, or rather just decides to paint the cloud all shades of silver and be glad about it. But the point is that he wasn't blindly optimistic. I liked that he seemed to have a solid understanding of the way business works, had no qualms about a false sense of entitlement. I work, I get paid for my work, I don't need any dole-outs. And hell, life is good!

Of course it comes as no surprise that I was so much happier travelling with the second guy. His positive energy was such a refreshing change from all the Cribby-Mc-Cribbersons that a lot of these taxi drivers are. Really turned my end-of-work-day-tired frown upside down. 

And made me realise yet again, that no one (or no company) can keep everyone happy or everyone unhappy. There're always both camps in every situation. 

Excuse me please

People who lack basic courtesy irk me. 

Strangers are often subject to a mental dressing down by me long after we’ve crossed paths. Of course, none of it has any impact on their existence so instead I’ve decided to vent online. Such is the joy of living in the connected age!

If you’re walking along a corridor with a swinging door at the end, why wouldn’t you spend an extra second to keep the door open till the person walking three steps behind you reaches it? I’m not talking about opening the door and letting them pass before you, but just an extra push to make sure they’ve got a hold of it before you go on your way. It seems to be something that comes instinctively to a lot of people, most of whom aren’t Indian. It isn’t even about men being courteous for women. According to me, this is a civil courtesy that everyone should afford everyone else. 

Along the same lines, I notice a lot of people in offices who just wait for the person on the other side of the door to swipe their access cards, and then quickly go through before that person has themselves crossed. As if the other person is waiting just to open the door for you. It’s quite ridiculous. What give you the entitlement of right of way? 

It’s as if it’s never in your favour to be patient and give people a fair chance. Everyone just seems to be looking out for themselves. It even comes across in our tendencies to cut lines. Whether it’s while waiting for an elevator, or while driving. The basic assumption is - let me go first, I’ll be gone before anyone else is inconvenienced.

Well, let me tell you something. Every time, every single time that you cut in front of another person, you are inconveniencing them! No exceptions. So learn to wait your turn, be courteous to the person in front of you or behind you, and just be a better human being! It's not that much to ask for.